Category Archives: Uncategorized
I heard about the site www.Wordle.net from another blog. You can put in the address of your blog, and it will take your most used words to make a pic. Took a little chance, and this coolness came about:
“Dreaming of you pushing up to me,
And I know where it’s gonna lead.
I’m dreaming of you rushing up to me,
You know it’s where you want to be..”
-Bombay Bicycle Club
Image via http://empressofkink.tumblr.com
“Lost in Your Forest”
“Colours and Concepts”
I love this guy’s artwork! To check out more go to:
Sometimes there’s an itch, and you want to scratch it so badly.. I have that itch, but it’s as if my hands are tied above my head. The more my hands try to loosen, my wrists chafe. Frustration mounts. My mind cries out for help. Finally exhaustion looms, the battle is lost. Sleep until another day. Another day, not able to scratch.
It got me thinking about how I’ve recently been pondering my mental status. I’ve said, more than once, “maybe I need to go back on medicine, could it be my bipolar showing up?”. I have yet to discuss this with a doctor, I almost don’t want to. I can’t imagine having to tell a doctor, that I don’t know, “I told my husband I would sleep with other men, with his permission. Is this my bipolar?” The numbness I felt while on medication previously, isn’t something I would necessarily want to repeat. But- what if I don’t really want these things? Okay, maybe I’d still want them, but would be able to push it out of my mind easier. Is it the impulsive, promiscuous side of my nature just pushing through?
On the numbness issue, I’ve never felt as numb and devoid of all feeling as a couple of weeks ago. Everything was a fog, a haze. One day, I woke up and that nothingness had lessened. I’m still depressed, I still feel impulsive. I am actually feeling though.. At what price?
After our conversation last week things have been odd. He had told me, not to worry about it. Apparently it was as if I had never said a word. As days pass, I’m noticing his increasingly veiled comments.
“Were you attracted to him?” Nods in the direction of a guy.
“Yes.” No point in withdrawing the honesty now.
“I was at her house earlier.. I’ve been going over there quite a bit.” He’s joking..
Trying to bait me? See if I’ll act jealously?
I am left pondering, is he coming around to the idea? Or just making me think that telling him was okay?